January 1st, 2018: Hubbo and I were celebrating the new year. I had heard of a “wish jar”, and I wanted us both to participate in it to see what the universe would bring.
Any container with a tightly-closed lid can make a wish jar. Jam jars are perfect. A delicious jar of Strawberry Madame Conserve was eaten in order for this particular task to take place.
Initially I found it hard to think about what it was I needed for the year; what I wanted to ask the universe for. Something related to work, money, fitness, desire, location, friendships; what?
I placed three wishes into the jar. It was placed on top of the treat cupboard in the kitchen and forgotten about for a lengthy amount of time.
Hello, December 31st! Quite where that year went, I have no idea.
So… here we go… I pulled out:
* * *
Earn more money (no beating around the bush)!
As it happened, I had gone for an interview March 2018 and was offered the job. Salary increase – thank you very much. I started that job in September 2018, so by the time I had opened up the wish, I had already seen the increase of money in my bank account and felt the benefits of the pay rise.
Thank you, universe.
To be fitter/healthier.
For my daughter to do well in her final year at primary school and to secure the secondary school of her choice. Both worked out well, and by the end of December 2018 she had competed three months of big school and settled in.
Score. Happy Mama.
* * *
I went to bed that night mostly contented. Sure, I was a bit disappointed in myself that another year had gone by and I still hadn’t managed to put my health and fitness first. Why was that? Why was I unable to do it for another year?
During that sleep, something magical happened. It was almost like an angel came down and whispered into my ear. I woke up happy – really happy. Because I had got fitter, and I was healthier. It was staring me in the face and I just didn’t see it.
To me, the “fitter and healthier” aspect meant that I should have started an activity, like running; or being healthier in terms of being cleaner with my food choices. That’s what I expected.
Turns out, the universe read my wish a different way. In October 2018, it was confirmed that I had mass in my colon. In November 2018, I had it removed from my body. In December 2018, the mass was confirmed as stage two, colonic cancer.
In December 2018, I was healthier and I was definitely much fitter.
Why did I not make the connections? Why did I think I had failed? I thought long and hard about this, and this was my conclusion:
We set ourselves goals with very little room for movement, without considering the journey. I just wanted to start running; more importantly, if I didn’t achieve that, I would feel disappointed in myself. Furthermore, because I didn’t run, I felt I had failed. I didn’t look for alternative options. There was definitely a white elephant in the room. I couldn’t see it.
Where are the celebrations for mini successes? Where are the celebrations for achievements that are completed, that weren’t “goals”, but are equally not on the radar. We push them to one side and do not give them any credit as they don’t necessarily reach expectation.
This was me in December 2018: Blinkers on; couldn’t see the wood for the trees.
In reflection, 2018 was quite a good year for wishes. I did get a pay rise and I did get a healthier, fitter life. A shift in my perception was all that was needed, and a willing to see the elephant.